SELF DOUBT – WHO SHOULD READ THIS ARTICLE?
This is an astrological article written for anyone interested in the topic of self doubt. It’ll make more sense if you have some knowledge of astrology, but non-astrologers might still find relevant information especially if they’re open to astrological metaphors.
FIRST, LET’S LISTEN TO BLAKE
If the sun and moon should doubt,
They’d immediately go out.
AN ASTROLOGICAL COMMENTARY ON SELF DOUBT
Blake’s words above suggest that self doubt turns off the source of your light, thereby turning off your entire horoscope.
Picture your horoscope where the lights of your Sun and Moon are gradually fading, with everything growing dark as a result…
Self doubt is like that – it weakens your entire system – it’s the psychic equivalent of influenza.
No matter how well positioned your natal chart is, or how “fortunate” your current transit appears, without strong self-confidence, you might not be able to realize even 10% of your innate potential.
WHAT CAUSES SELF-DOUBT?
In terms of astrology, you look at your Ascendant (self-image) and the placement of its ruler to see if it is under strong tension. A well supported Ascendant and its ruler suggests that the formation of self-image was relatively smooth. If either your Ascendant or its ruler is under strong tension (i.e. receives a hard aspect from Mars or outer planets), that suggests there were considerable challenges you had to face during the development of your ego (self-image.)
If the challenges were too much to bear, you might grow up with crippling self doubt, expressed through shyness or overcompensatory effort to please others and gain approval.
In terms of psychological development, these are some of the factors that contribute to the formation of strong self-doubt:
- Unstable family background – where your family is broken, or there are constant fights within your home
- Excessive criticism and lack of encouragement – if adult acknowledgement is not given, it’s difficult to form self-confidence
- Lack of emotional bonding – Emotional bonding (symbolized by the Moon in your natal chart) creates the foundation of your psychic stability, and thus is the prerequisite to form strong self-confidence. In a family where no affections are expressed, a child may feel insecure because she does not know whether she is lovable or not.
- Poor parental modeling – If the parents behave in a way that causes children to doubt them – or even feel afraid or ashamed (in the case of abusive parents) – the children may grow up internalizing this doubt or shame, in effect becoming adults like their parents, who they are not proud of.
Note that “failure” is not part of these factors that cause self-doubt. If your emotional foundation is relatively strong, you can overcome the disappointment of failures and channel them into your next effort until you succeed. It’s when you have a shaky foundation that makes you vulnerable to every failure.
WAYS TO OVERCOME SELF DOUBT
Self doubt can be replaced with genuine confidence. Life offers many pathways to grow in true confidence, and here are some examples:
- Forming your own family – Many clients tell me that forming their own family really made a difference, because they were able to make different choices compared to their parents in raising their children, and realized their own power in forming a stable family.
- Finding someone that believes in you – This could be finding a friend, mentor or a coach that sees the best in you and supports you in realizing your potential. Finding one such relationship could be life changing, as you feel your self-confidence soar thanks to the power of your supporter’s faith.
- Gaining skills & accomplishing goals – Finding something you’re passionate about, and directing your energy to get better at it over time can give you a huge confidence boost. In about 2 years you can get good at something (this is due to a Mars cycle.) By setting and accomplishing goals repeatedly, you gain true self confidence born of experience.
- Healing yourself emotionally – the earlier lack of emotional bonding can be healed with therapeutic work, by forming a strong internal emotional connection with yourself. It’s by forming this connection to yourself that you’ll gain the confidence to be able to connect with others in a genuine way.
IN CLOSING – FINDING TRUE CONFIDENCE
Your life purpose is to realize your unique innate potential – and to do that, your lights must be allowed to shine brightly. Just about everyone experiences self doubt at one point or another – but with experience (and enough support from people around you), you’ll be able to move forward toward your goals with confidence.